Welcome to my world as of late......
I have been struggling with this lately. I am having a hard time facing the fact that I am approaching my 32 birthday and my life is nowhere near where I expected it to be... But maybe that is just the problem, I EXPECTED and didn't do.. (Or I failed miserably DOING....)
An accurate description of me.... (In my own eyes)
single (never been engaged or married)
no kids (although I crave a family more than anything)
stuck in a lack luster job
Maybe its just the season, I am not sure really. All I know is that I NEVER imagined my life to be like this.
I fail miserably at dating and/or relationships. I can't seem to keep anyone interested in me or loving me. Maybe I am impossible, maybe I will be that crazy cat lady everyone talks about... I unfortunately see myself alone more and more.
I guess my most recent "dumping" triggered these feelings to surface again. Maybe I am scared of becoming my grandmother. Don't get me wrong she is an amazing woman, but she is also very alone and very bitter because of it. I don't want to be that person... I want a family, I want to have companionship. I want love in my life....
Everytime I think about it or start talking about it, I just cry....